Tuesday, June 7, 2011


You know who you are.

Sometimes stalkers are creepy, sometimes they can just be weirdos that don't know how to say hi but really want to and then they just hover around your periphery like an awkward satellite, orbiting you at a distance that doesn't allow for easy conversation, but is close enough to make both of you uncomfortable. Sometimes you have a stalker that you'll never find out about. And sometimes, you become friends with your stalkers :) but this can be tricky, you want to take into consideration several things before you take this step, I think you can probably think of a few things. If you can't, let's just say it has a lot to do with the amount of information they know, how creepy or normal they are around you and others, if they have other friends, or if they are anything like this. (watch from 3:30 to 5:20)

But before I go on, I hope none of you are feeling guilty right now. Don't worry, I'm a ninja. I have done lots of stalking. This was usually because I needed to not be friends with these targets people because my sword has a hard time being nice of extenuating circumstances. Just remember that the difference between a stalker and a really good friend is that you won't know you're friends with a stalker whereas you will know you're friends with your friend. Another difference is that friends are mutually interested in each other and a stalker is excessively interested in finding out everything there is to know without exposing themselves. So, if you ever find out that a person you're stalking is stalking you, you might as well say hi, you're basically friends without the friendship part, and really, it's the friendship part that is the most fun.

I love my friends. I also love you, my stalkers. But before the stalkers get too excited, remember I don't actually know you, so it's not a huge love like you have for me. Remember also that I'm a ninja and if you're the scary/creepy/dangerous kind of stalker I would strongly encourage you to get counseling before I find you. If you're the acquaintance type who facebook stalked me and found this blog, likes photography, may or may not have a really cool accent, and likes crepes, I may or may not have stalked you back,... so, let's be friends.

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